"Can Someone, Anyone, Spare a Square????"

I love that Seinfeld episode where Elaine is in the public restroom and her stall is out of TP, so she asks the lady next to her to "spare a square." The woman refuses, and ends up being Jerry's date. Love that episode, as well as the one where George's dad celebrates "Festivus for the rest of us", and the Soup Nazi, I could go on and on. Anyway, my point...

My friend and I went out shopping and I had to use the potty before the 1/2 hour ride home. I finish my business and look to my right... to my alarm there is NO TP. NOT A SINGLE SHRED. And I had left my purse with my friend outside of the restroom. WHAT'S A GIRL TO DO??????????

Do I waddle to the next stall and hope no one comes in and is blinded by my huge white behind?

Do I drip dry, no that is too gross.

In the midst of my panic I see a way out of this mess. Below the wall of the stall to my right was a square. I pulled on it, and more came out. Thankfully, a mess and huge embarrassment was avoided that evening, I got some squares.

So, if you are ever stuck (I usually check if there is TP before I go, but I forgot, of course) in this situation, if no one is in the stall next to you, you can reach up into the next stall, discretely, and get a few squares. If someone is next to you, that would be creepy, so don't do it.

A Year Ago Today...

So, I am being a little nostalgic right now. Last November we sold our first home in Wisconsin and moved half way across the country to Pennsylvania, leaving some wonderful friends behind. It broke my heart to leave, yet I know that this is where we need to be right now. And, I love where we are, I just wish I could take all of my friends from WI with me.

A year ago today I had several friends help clean my house and pack up a truck to move across the country.

A year ago today I said good bye to some of the best friends I have ever had.

A year ago today a good friend let all 7 of us (at the time) stay in her home, another took care of my sick baby, and others watched, fed, and bathed my youngest kids. Others stayed most of the day helping us, one had her sick daughter lay on my floor and watch TV while she helped me. What a blessing to have friends who see your needs (and gently make suggestions) when you are too exhausted to make rational decisions.

A year ago today I learned that even though life is not fair at times, the unfairness of it can be what is really best for you in the end. As much as I hated to leave WI, the move here has been a huge blessing.

A year ago today I realized, once again, how very blessed we have been with good friends who have helped us to be better people. I consider knowing you an honor.

Thanks to all of you who have inspired me and been my friend, I love you.

Garage Sales

I used to go to garage sales all of the time. I stopped because I realized that I was getting too much stuff. I would go looking for something, but then come home with 5 other things, but not what I originally went there to buy. I am not a snob of used things, ask any of my friends. Used stuff is fine with me. I just end up buying stuff that I don't really need. My husband got to see how addictive the shopping can be...

So, my husband decides that he needs a bike to go on bike rides with the kids and that he is going to go the garage sale route to get one. That is fine. He even left the house on Saturday around 7:30 to go on this shopping adventure.

He called at 7:35. "Do you want a grill?" Absolutely, since the grill I make him use now is a small, wimpy, camp grill that he begs me not to make him grill burgers on one more time. The house on the corner was selling one. So, we got that.

He calls at 8:30. "Do you want a shovel?"
Me: "No, I got one when we moved. Where are you?"
Mike: "At a flea market. They just have some yard tools here, but I won't get any." Which, he didn't, he is better than I.

He calls at 9:00.
Mike: "Do we need a baby swing? This one is $5, battery operated, and works."
Me: "Yes, I sold ours at our yard sale in WI when I thought we were done having kids for "awhile".

Then my friend calls: "We are at a yard sale, did you say you were looking for a play kitchen set? Oh shoot, this one just sold. We'll keep our eyes out for you."

See, I don't need to go to yard sales, I just have people call me. Then I am not the one who is the impulsive shopper. Needless to say, we did not get a bike this weekend. We did get a grill, grill utensils, a tie rack, and a swing. $40 well spent, and I didn't spend any of it.

My Kryptonite

These are pictures of my nemesis. And a few pictures of something that removes it.

I saw something very disturbing the other day. It was about 97 degrees outside, very, very hot. As I walked through the parking lot a car drove by and I noticed something stringy attached to the tire. It was gum it had run over about 10 feet before. YUCK. Melty gum sticking to the tire, blah, yuck, yuck, YUCK!!!

Seriously, bubble gum is my "Kryptonite". I cannot take the smell of it (ask my husband. If he chews bubble gum I will not let him within 3 feet of me). I gag through that scene in "Elf" where Will Ferrel eats the gum that has been stuck to the bottom of the railing. GAG!!!

When my kids were given "bubble mint" flavored toothpaste by their grandmother, I hid it because it makes me gag. And the thought of scrubbing my kids mouth with a combo flavor of bubble gum and mint grosses me out. Sad, I know.

So, in primary (our classes for young children at church) I was in gum hell. I was teaching the lesson in front of all of the kids and my daughter walks up and spits her gum out in the trash can (WITHOUT wrapping it in something, which is my cardinal rule). I called on one child for an answer and as she starts talking, her gum falls out of her mouth (making me shudder). Then to top it all off the kid in the very front row starts pulling his gum out of his mouth, just playing with it in his fingers. I had to stop and ask anyone who has gum to keep it in their mouth, it grosses me out.

Totally pathetic, I know. But seriously, I gag when I smell it. I think it may be from going to the dentist and getting that nasty fluoride treatment? I don't know. I need to talk to someone about my issues.

What's your "Kryptonite"?

The Cup, Answered 2 Questions for Me

I have often wondered why men complain about have to buy feminine products for their wives. Just get the box, pay for it and go. It isn't like the cashier has never checked out a box of tampons and will laugh at you. Well, now I know why.

My 9 year old is playing baseball and needed a cup. So, I went to the store with it all, Walmart, to get this necessary piece of protection. I do want grandchildren to spoil, so we have to protect the equipment.

I pick up the cup, looked at it. Is it big enough. He is a youth large pants, does that mean he would take a youth large cup? Looking at it longer I think, this thing is huge, I don't even know that it will fit into his pants. But if I get the small one, it might be too small. Decisions, decisions.

I go for the larger size and think, "He can grow into it."

He tries it on, clearly it is too big. He can wear it on the outside of his pants and does during dinner, just to make us all laugh. My husband told him he couldn't wear it. Fearing that I have to return the cup that I had purchased, I over ruled (never, ever happens) and told him to go put it on. He said it felt ok and he wanted to wear it. I had visions of him running around the bases with this cup down around his ankles. So, now he is the one on the field adjusting himself all of the time.

Which answered my other question. Why during baseball games are the players always adjusting something in their crotch? Now I know, their mom's bought cups for them that were too big.

Fundraising

The picture pretty much sums up what I think about fund raisers. And it shows what happens to almost all fundraisers that cross into the Nelson house. My kids are always bummed not to get the prizes that entice them to sell this junk. But they get over it.

Now, there are some that I don't mind doing, like buying hoagies (or subs) or the occasional spaghetti dinner, where I actually get something that I want. It is the $15 cookie dough, $30 cheesecake, and $10 roll of gift wrap that I refuse to let my kids sell (they usually only get about 20% of the profit anyway, I would much rather make a donation).

My 9 year old plays baseball and one night at practice the president of the league came to make a presentation to the kids about the fundraiser. My sons eyes lit up as the man talked about the prizes he could earn, a ticket to the Reading Phillies (minor league, but none the less fun to watch), if he sold 10 items. The least expensive of these items was about $15. So, if he sells $150 worth of stuff, cons 10 people into buying this stuff, he gets a $10 ticket to the game. He went on to inspire my son that if he sold another 10 items he could make $10 to spend at the game. (My son LOVES to hear about fast ways to earn money that don't require a bunch of work). By the end of the meeting he was thinking that Dad and I were going to buy 20 items and he would cash in on us. He also didn't realize that every kid in our town has been sent home with the same info, therefore any neighbors we have are out.

Hmmmm. How about I save us a bunch of time and we spend $20 for a tickets for you and Dad to go to the game instead. He was happy with that, although disappointed that he will not be able to make any money. He is planning on doing a lemonade stand this summer. Where we live is VERY rural, and I think he may learn that making money takes a lot of time sometimes. It will be a good lesson.

Lots of "Me Time"

I have had two very fun days in a row. Yesterday Mike took me to one of my favorite places to shop. I feel like when I walk in the "gods of organization and cool ideas" and their angels sing heavenly praises and rays of sunlight shine on me. Yes, we went to IKEA to spend a gift card that his mom gave me for my birthday. I love their kitchen stuff. If you lack cabinet and drawer space they make fabulous rods where you can hang your cooking utensils. They also have these really cool knife magnets that you mount and then can store your knives, can opener, kitchen scissors, anything else metal that you want to store there (I didn't have to buy one of these because this is what Mike made me for my birthday. A knife magnet encased in this beautiful "birdseye maple" wood). It was a fun day and my husband was such a good sport about it. We ate there and my lunch was sooooooooo good. The people near us had gotten their kids the organic pasta and vegetable medley. Well, our kids ate the PB & J, cookies, and chocolate milk. I think my 23 month old had some fries, juice, and a cookie. So much for a healthy meal. I don't push it when we are out, not worth the fight for me right now. Dinner was more healthy.

Today I got another treat. For my birthday my mom got me a gift card to a spa for a facial. She watched the kids while I went and got a facial. It was so nice to lay there for an hour of peace and quiet. The facial was nice, only had a small part that was uncomfortable. I told the lady about my skin issues on my nose (large pores, lots of junk gets caught in there). She had this little tool that was the size of a pen and had suction in it, like a little vacuum and pushed it all over my nose. Honestly, it was painful, but she got all of the junk out of the pores. That is the job for me. One of my weird secrets is that I should have become a dermatologist. When I see a pimple on myself, husband, or kids for some reason it is so hard for me to resist an attempt to pop it. I know, totally, totally gross. Sorry, probably TMI, but this is my blog, so there. It was a great birthday. My kitchen will be so much more organized and my skin is so smooth and clean. Back to reality tomorrow.